Talking with Maxx about Ants

A con­ver­sa­tion about ants with my cat Maxx:

Maxx: Hey, hate to tell you this, we have ants, I know you hate them, but regard­less, we got them.

Saul: NO!, I HATE ants, I haven’t seen any ants, how do you know we have them?

Maxx: I’m a cat, I’m plugged into the uni­verse at a lev­el you wouldn’t even begin to under­stand, oh and Piper texted me ‘We have ants!, tell what­shis­name’, I’m assum­ing she means you.

Saul: Damn!, Piper is almost nev­er wrong, have you con­firmed that we have ants?

Maxx: I just walked through the kitchen and didn’t hear ants, that’s all the con­fir­ma­tion I need

Saul: But you didn’t hear any­thing

Maxx: Ants are sneaky qui­et, in the hier­ar­chy of qui­et it’s; cats, ninjas, Sasquatch, ants

Saul: Wow qui­eter than Sasquatch, that is qui­et

Maxx: Yep, the sim­ple fact that I heard noth­ing is a 83% con­fir­ma­tion, we’re lousy with ants

Saul: You’re an a-list preda­tor can you do any­thing about the ants? maybe squash them?

Maxx: They’ve done noth­ing to me

Saul: I guess squash­ing them is a bit extreme, do you have any good news for me?

Maxx: Well you don’t have nin­jas… I think